The next two days, some participants left and a few more came to attend the Transcendence part of the Retreat.
The entire 2 days was filled with, what can you expect? More dynamic discourses, exercises, initiations and blessings. Sree Maa’s discourses always hovered around Absolute Truth that really rattled the beliefs mind had created and yet Sree Maa maintained lightness with a bright sense of humor. Sree Maa always encouraged us to keep an open mind and do mañan and chintan to arrive at our own conclusions.
For the first time, i experienced doing Pradakshinas around Sree Maa Shri Ji’s photo with everyone as an exercise. It was an eye-opening experience. i was the first one to start the pradakshinas as no-one was taking the first step. As i started, everyone started to join when they were ready. i wanted to run around the photo but was forced to slow down at everyone’s speed. Can’t deny i felt annoyed that no-one wanted to start and once i started, everyone followed and were coming in my way and slowing me down 😇 Kindly excuse my selfish thoughts but i am speaking honestly🙏
i even wanted to get out of the circle and just run but couldn’t as there was no space and i was literally pushed into being in synchronicity with everyone and not do what i wanted. It was this practical exercise that truly showed me that we all had to move in synchronicity, in One rhythm as the non-doer, for the mission and vision of Sree Maa Shri Ji, Kosmic Fusion to reach its epitome. What a beautiful experience where without any lecture i came to this self-realization where the only central focus was Sree Maa Shri Ji and their vision and mission for which all FiTs had asked to volunteer and must move in Oneness towards that One goal_/\_
i had disrupted the personal communal session of fusing in Dec 2014 where we went the mental way of verbalizing each one’s individual script and then tuning in with QVSWPP to neutralize it together in oneness but Pradakshina exercise done in complete silence was absolutely beautiful_/\_ Sree Maa Shri Ji, what a brilliant way to fuse everyone together and to remind everyone of that One goal for which we had been graciously accepted to volunteer__/\o_
Sree Maa Shri Ji gave a massive blessing of activating the Anandmaya Kosha (bliss body). It is one of the subtle layers that gets activated for yogis, seers after millions of years of spiritual practice. Sree Maa Shri Ji gifted it to us just like that. i loved doing the shashtang dandavats in Sree Maa Shri Ji’s lotus feet again during these two days and really wondered why i had deprived myself of it in all these years that i had known Sree Maa Shri Ji when i hail from Bharat and touching feet of elders and gurus is a common norm.
There were many discourses given as always and Sree Maa Shri Ji encouraged everyone to bring their questions to transcend out of the layers of avidya (lack of knowledge) and agnyan (ignorance).
Sree Maa Shri Ji explained to us about the Guru Mantra and then gave us time to think if we wanted to be initiated into it. As dakshina, each one of us gave a bad habit that we wanted to get rid off. Guru Mantra was the door way to be initiated into being a Sanatana Dharmi, the one who lives righteously like an akarmi (non-doer). All this was explained very clearly.
i already had 3 mantras that i was using to meditate on, two had been given when i was initiated into TM and the third one for Sahaj Samadhi meditation and all 3 had been substantial in my spiritual growth. i didn’t know what to do with them and voiced it to Sree Maa Shri Ji. It took 1 minute for Sree Maa to clear away the antar dwand (inner conflict) i was experiencing based on one of the discourses Sree Maa had given previously and it made sense that all mantras initiated from AUM. i chose to receive the initiation.
During the initiation, the conflict that i had experienced earlier came and stood right in front of me. My own conscience shouted at me for being selfish and betraying my first Guru Sri Sri Ravi Shankar who had helped me unconditionally in my time of need. He never forced his teachings and courses on me, i had gone and done them, benefitted from them and chose him as my Guru, taken respite at his Ashram and now suddenly as i found something more advanced and better, i was disowning him. i felt really bad that i was letting him go after selfishly using him, his teachings and his techniques until i wanted to. The tap of tears opened again and i just couldn’t move forward to receive the soundless sound mantra. In that moment, i called out to him and he showed up. The closure that he gave me has been instrumental in keeping my faith in the Guru principle and to move forward in truly accepting Sree Maa Shri Ji as my Guru. i still find it very overwhelming to express this part and am taking the liberty to share the audio recording where i shared my experience. Humbly requesting all listeners to listen to it from the recesses of your soul and not the judgement of the ego as i was reeling under very intense emotions and a phase of shift and transformation when i did the sharing_/\_ Gratitude in advance for your understanding and empathy_/\_
It was the May 2015 Kawai Pura Retreat that was a game changer. This is also where all FiTs met everyone in a physical location. i first met Sarah Sunshine (Sarala), Jabeen McMohan (Jwala), Cherry Weir (Nirali), Mima (Mahima), Tiffanie Lim/Tara (http://souljournaling1.blogspot.com) and Manjit Surry/Mala (http://truthspinner1.blogspot.com).
The first 4 days of the Retreat was Practitioner’s training which was attended by over 20 5D++ Pulsars inclusive of FiTs. i must have attended 3 or 4 practitioner trainings with Sree Maa Shri Ji since 2012 and i must say that each time i learnt something new as the course content was different. All trainings were experiential and the only thing that remained constant was to ‘STEP-BACK’ to allow the QVSWPP to step in, be the NON-DOER. There were multitude of discourses given in all trainings by Sree Maa covering a range of subjects and so many initiations and blessings were graced on everyone of which i don’t have a count. i only feel Gratitude for SreeMaaShriJi__/\o_
One of the experiences that SreeMaaShriJi Graced everyone was ‘Visiting the Abode of the Absolute’. This was a very profound experience, almost next to Samadhi. i could only feel my heartbeat and had zero awareness of anything else. Don’t remember where i went but recall prostrating to Sree Maa and Shri Ji. Had lost all track of time. Suddenly heard Sree Maa’s voice in the room to offer gratitude before leaving and come back in the body, i felt my entire heart area open up, like someone had opened a door and lifted weight off. i have never felt so light and fresh as i did that day when i visited the Abode of the Absolute, like i am not the body and mind but just Atma_/\_
Om Sai Brahman, the greeting that all FiTs were using with one another was introduced to the Practitioners as well and the meaning explained. Value of prostration that was explained in the Sanatana Dharma what’s app chat group in Mar 2015 was explained in detail with the movement of energetic currents in the body to everyone attending this Practitioner workshop. This hadn’t been explained in the previous Practitioner workshops. There were a few who had their reservations about it and there was absolutely no force or compulsion on them. i loved doing it in Sree Maa Shri Ji’s lotus-feet. i always felt a soothing wave when i did my shashtang dandavats to Sree Maa and a very strong wave when i did it in Shri Ji’s lotus feet. It was evident that whatever Absolute Truth Sree Maa revealed, it wasn’t always limited to just FiTs, it was incorporated in other workshops too and really, that’s how the course content was very dynamic. Repeating workshops with Sree Maa wasn’t boring or repetitive but highly dynamic as the initiations and Absolute Truth shared were different in each one. Sree Maa is an extremely spirited and versatile mentor_/\_
On the last day of the Practitioner workshop, Sree Maa Shri Ji offered the organ cleanse for which all FiTs had been recommended to take the homeopathic detox medicine. Grace of removal of entities from the organs was offered to even the Practitioners who were not going to stay back for FiT training by beloved Sree Maa Shri Ji. The experience was very intense where i felt intense rage surface and release. i had tears rolling down like a tap had been opened. i still recall that i never felt anything in the body and never felt any love but felt huge Gratitude for Sree Maa Shri Ji_/\_ Sree Maa Shri Ji ended the workshop with everyone listening and singing ‘Achyutam Keshavam’ and Sree Maa explaining the meaning of the beautiful bhajan_/\_
Main Apki atyant AbhAri hoon aur sadA rahoongi Sree Maa Shri Ji for the immense Grace showered, especially the organ cleanse, where the brunt of transmuting the slush was taken by Sree Maa Shri Ji on their own bodies. Sree Maa Shri Ji were very unwell after the Retreat but not once complained or mentioned about it to anyone_/\_ It was Archita who had stayed back after the Retreat for some time noticed and wrote an email to all FiTs about the same_/\_