i felt elated after the prolific May 2015 Kawai Pura Retreat and i was finding it difficult hiding the joy i was feeling from within. Listening to devotional songs took me in a different zone of bliss altogether which had never happened before. Earlier, i listened to bhajans at loud volume to cut out mental noise and to allow the vibration of the chant bring energetic shifts. For the first time, i experienced how people would feel ecstatic by visiting temples in ancient Bharat and singing devotional songs. i could feel it sitting at home or in my hotel room 🙇💕.
i started researching the net for bhajans and sent them to Sree Maa if they were suitable to be circulated amongst the FiTs. Sree Maa selected a few to be circulated that were easy to sing, if not comprehend and left the tough Sanskrit ones out. i was enthralled at how much Sree Maa cared for everyone and truly was an exceptional mentor who had literally given birth to the akarmi in all of us and had been nurturing it like a mother🙏i felt immense gratitude and respect for Sree Maa and Shri Ji and based on all feedbacks everyone had given during and after the Retreat, even Dallia to some extent, i assumed everyone felt the same and experienced similar shifts if not paramount ones that i did. This assumption and blindly believing everyone for what they said costed me and my most dear Sree Maa and Shri Ji dearly in 2016/2017.
Embodying the non-doer fully was really beautiful to which the Kosmic Bhagwad Gita was sheer indulgence. The discourses on Shrimad Bhagwad Geeta didn’t make as much sense as they did after the retreat. The shift was so phenomenal that it marked the cessation of hypnotherapy clients for me. i couldn’t bear to listen to the mental and emotional woes of clients that i knew were just the density of the Sukshm sharir (subtle bodies) and the True Soul/Atma is so pure, totally devoid of the slush of the Antahkaran. i felt i would be a cheat if i continued with the sessions and did not introduce people to the treasure i had found, QVSWPP, the gift of Grace by beloved Sree Maa and Shri Ji_/\_
After a while, 4 antahkarans namely mann (mind), buddhi (intellect), chitt (emotive mind), ahankar (ego) started acting up again. It was shocking to realize that despite the magnanimous gifts and blessings from Sree Maa to embody the akarmi, anatahkaran still worked like a hard core programme that needed constant monitoring and cleansing to avoid dust and slush settling as thoughts and emotions. What was a relief and quite astounding though was that with just a little effort of tuning-in with QVSWPP, akarmi took the reigns back in no time and told it off that “sorry, you are not in control anymore.” i was very aware of the Self witnessing the antahkaran and not get embroiled in its drama.
2014 was an eventful year with a lot of online FiT training calls, training videos, Kosmic Tribe get togethers, meet up meditations, Kosmic clinics etc. There was a 9 days online Akashic Records Master Readers Workshop in July 2014 and i was most impressed with Sree Maa Shri Ji’s commitment levels. Sree Maa Shri Ji lead by example. This was also the year where we wrote letters to self-reflect and introspect. i wrote my first SELF to self letter in Aug 2014. Till date i like to refer to my self-reflection letters written from SELF to self and self to SELF and use them as a measure to gauge how i have grown and how to tackle my small self when it acts like a stubborn child that does not want to budge.
To help all FiTs to bond, Sree Maa Shri Ji organized a personal communal session in Dec 2014. i had a strong reaction against it and disrupted the entire session mid-way. Sree Maa never till date once reprimanded or commented how i disrupted Sree Maa’s session with the entire group and has displayed to me by example that non-doer has zero expectations, an example of nishkaam karma that i realized much later.
Open reflection was encouraged very highly by Sree Maa to help break ice and to view, witness and move out of the ego patterns in the latter part of 2014. Even though Sree Maa had said it openly that the ego was everyone’s own responsibility, as the phase 1 was reaching an end, Sree Maa out of compassion and love and in preparation for the formal launch of the FiT Programme helped FiTs to look at their grey shades. One such reflection question and answer session on the ‘FiT’ whats app group chat is as follows:
The mentoring style was novel and done on what’s app as all FiTs were in different time zones. The reflection questions posed by Sree Maa were aimed at breaking the ego out of it’s comfort zone and the Absolute Truth shared were unparalleled. Sree Maa always kept a very honest and truthful approach and the feedback given was always based on Absolute Truth that Sree Maa shared through out the programme. Well! Kosmic Fusion was the School of Absolute Truth, so how could this ingredient be missing😉
Phase 1 was coming to an end. The doer stepped in every now and then but stepping-back was becoming easier with constant practice and awareness and mainly by tuning-in to QVSWPP which could be done anytime anywhere. Consistently operating as the non-doer was still work in progress and the reflection and self introspection were key elements in staying in the non-doer zone🙏🙇
Early 2014, Sree Maa introduced the concept of self/Self/SELF and introduced the greeting ‘Om Sai Brahman’ that all FiTs used with one another. It became increasingly evident that it was the small self, my own ego that was my biggest road block in realizing the Self and that the FiT trial was a practical training ground about becoming aware of these shades and moving past them with the help of QVSWPP, my 24 by 7 companion graciously gifted by Sree Maa Shri Ji. i was very aware that Sree Maa had taken a big risk as conflicts and discordancy between FiTs had already emerged due to reacting egos in 2013 itself. Remember reading an email where Sree Maa had clearly spelt out that each one’s raging ego is everyone’s individual responsibility.
Sree Maa was most gracious to allow all FiTs to sit for the 2 days online 5D++ AwaKeNiN TrAnsForMaTiON (0 to 7) workshops to observe and learn and get accustomed to the online software that was used but all FiTs had to log out for the 0 session and then log back again. It was crystal clear from the start that no-one could and would be trained for removing the dense obsolete 3D/4D grids. It was only Sree Maa Shri Ji who would be doing that.
It is one such online 5D++ AwaKeNiN TrAnsForMaTiON (0 to 7) workshop in Oct 2014 where my mum and dad, and my brother chose to their process and i felt elated that everyone in my small little family had been gifted with this most precious gift by Sree Maa Shri Ji. That was the day i felt the undertones of energetic discordancy in my family smoothen out in the times to follow. i also felt that whatever my family had done for me, i had completed my responsibility towards them by being the saadhan (medium) to introduce them to Kosmic Fusion and Sree Maa Shri Ji. i experienced an enormous inner relief that QVSWPP would now take care of them just like IT was constantly taking care of me since 2012. The inner worry that i had that ‘i was sitting so far from them and if anything untoward was to happen, i wouldn’t be there’ dissipated fully. Wherever life took each of us from now on is best for our atma. QVSWPP, the All-Knowing and most benevolent Signature would take care of them exactly how IT was taking care of me. Atyant AbhAr Sree Maa Shri Ji for bringing such supreme Grace to everyone in my family_/\_
This was also the workshop after which my interactions with Valarie Rosemary Fernandes/Virali (http://infinitelyblessedandgrateful.blogspot.com) increased as she came to attend this workshop from my place. Archita, i and Virali were awesome threesome in Dubai 🙂
i was very fortunate to travel to New Zealand every now and then. On one such occasion in Feb 2014, i was most fortunate to attend a Kosmic Tribe get-together in Auckland and meet 5D++ Pulsars in New Zealand. i first met Ritu Bhargava/Nandini (https://transformationofnarcissist.blogspot.com/), Orja, Renee Ryder/Renu, Devi and many more for the first time here. i was more focussed on Sree Maa though. Once again i witnessed how Dallia interjected Sree Maa with unnecessary questions. Nonetheless, the discourse was instrumental in me wanting to be with Sree Maa and understand more. This was the first time Sree Maa revealed that there was no difference between Quantum Vortex Scalar Wave Photon Pulse and Sree Maa Shri Ji, IT is their Original consciousness.
Sree Maa was an exceptional mentor and i couldn’t believe my good fortune that i had managed to attract Sree Maa Shri Ji in my life. It felt that all the effort i had put on my spiritual path, Sree Maa Shri Ji was the fruition of it🙏🙇